You ought to have been there, brother...

You ought to have been there, brother
Oh, you ought to...
Why, there were Negroes, as far as the eye could see
Every shade and shape of chocolate candy
Twirling in the breeze and being cool
It was a sight
A sight to see... to behold... to marvel at...
You ought to have been there, brother
Oh, you ought to...
Why, there was whiteys, all the way like from here to Mexico...
Big ones, small ones, cute ones, ugly ones...
They even had ones from the Clan.... the...
It was a sight...
A wonder...
But, suddenly, she emerged...
The Pastor's wife
Gaited by her... behind
I wondered if life was fair...
For fairer women than she...
Hath lain as whores...
But this wholesome beast of beauty
She lies with the Holy Ghost...
"Praise the Lord" she said, passing by me...
Spraying her perfume in the wind...
"You have a strong spirit brother" she said
"Can we converse?"
"If it is to convert me," I suggested earnestly...
"The prospect of dwelling between your thighs might make me..."
"....Consider...."
"Praise the Lord," she smiled shyly, "but I'm married to the pastor..."
Was there a more beautiful woman in history?
I think not...
But you don't believe?
Ah, but brother... you ought to have been there...