The Awon Boyz

In a country like Nigeria, vanity is everything. The aesthetic rules, despite the obvious lack of it environmentally. So, huddled in feculence, alpha-males show off their latest... jeans... and boots... and wristwatches... and collared shirts... is really what it is. They are stylish, it is true, and very commanding, so that young boys growing up internalize an aggregated image of the kind of awon boy they want to be when they, too, are enabled. I became a superior awon boy when I was in college, away from Nigeria. Called a legend by outsiders who heard of my exploits, I was very aware that in the year 1996 I was the "seniorest boy" on campus. Compared to now those days are negligble. So how does it feel to be an awon boy of note in the world? It's tickling. I can get lost in other people's appreciation of me and mentally masturbate for hours, making people laugh through the sharing of my experiences, pausing only long enough for my greatness to be obvious to a dying world. Alas, I spend my awonboyhood with outlaws and Masons. We, it turns out, have serious work to do.